A few years ago I explained some things to my girls as they entered middle school and were starting puberty. I told them the things I wish someone had told me when I was their age.
I must warn you, that I don’t beat around the bush. I don’t want to speak in flowery language, because I want them to understand what I’m saying.
It’s like when they started their period and I gave them the blow-by-blow rundown. “Just know that you can get pregnant now.” I explained the science behind the different parts of their cycle and what was happening to their bodies. Knowledge is power!
Since I’ve had this talk with my daughters about middle school, THEY have referenced it to me. There are some parts of it I have repeated multiple times when they needed to hear it. Knowledge is power for these middle school girls. Knowing they aren’t alone is everything.
My talk went something like this:
To my Daughters in Middle School:
So, the next few years in middle school will be the most awkward of your life. If you ever feel un-pretty or clumsy or un-cool, just know that you are not alone. You will feel like you are the only one going through it, but in fact, almost every single other girl in your grade is worried about these kinds of things too.
Puberty is doing things to your body that feel weird. Your clothes are fitting differently and it may be uncomfortable sometimes. This is quite normal, though, because your body is changing in a once-in-a-lifetime unique way. You will get used to how your new body moves and feels. You will not always feel awkward! You may think everyone is staring at you and noticing all the little things you do, but everyone else your age is too busy secretly wondering if everyone is staring at them. Only your parents are looking that closely at you, and we love you no matter what!
Also, hormones really do affect your ability to think clearly, so all of your emotions may feel more extreme during your middle school years. You will feel happier and you will feel sadder. And if you feel these things, congratulations, you have arrived in middle school.
I promise you will get through this. Middle school doesn’t last forever. You don’t have to have life figured out right now, you just need to get through this. And please stay a little weird, because I like the special things that make you YOU.
If you have questions, you know who to ask (me!).
If you have kids entering middle school, please feel free to share this from you to them. Middle School is hard for our girls. They need all the encouragement we can give. They need to know what they’re going through isn’t weird and terrible, well it’s terrible … but that’s normal.